birthday wishes 2011 - revised

What a difference a week makes...

While I still intend to adhere to the list (which you can view here), but one wish needs to be added to the very top of the list:  

that my mom wins her battle with pancreatic cancer.

On Saturday, the news hit like a ton of bricks - and it wasn't easy to fully absorb.  In fact, the reality hit about 1:30 am Tuesday when I finally cried (and generally, I'm not a crier).  That's when I stopped asking "why my mom?"  and realized this energy needed to go to support my mom in any way possible.  Right now, I think my "support" is coming in the forms of:  strength and encouragement, a sounding board and comic relief (go figure).  But her daughter saying funny, stupid shit will play a role in her recovery.

Thankfully, my mom is resilient and determined (or as I like to say "a strong stubborn German woman" - yes, that is a compliment - and if anyone can beat this it's a strong, stubborn German woman).  She is also receiving some of the best health care in the world at Johns Hopkins, so I know medically she is good hands.  And either my dad, brother or sister-in-law (and sometimes all three) are going with her to the appointments - which undeniably helps.  Plus, she has her faith.  If you are one of those praying types, my mom would greatly appreciate them.  If not - please send good vibes and happy, healing thoughts her way. 

Most importantly, my mom is staying in good spirits (all things considered) and is living her life to the fullest.  I'm believing she's one of the less that 10% that beats the disease, but I've learned rather quickly to savor every moment of life while you can fully enjoy it.  

have foot, will travel

For quite some time (at least a year), I have been contemplating going car-free.

Seriously.

Living on Milwaukee's "fashionable" east side, I've realizing almost everything I need on a daily basis is within a mile - drug store, grocery store, nightlife, entertainment and even volleyball.  My only reservation was commuting 12 miles to work, as MCTS sometimes does not have the greatest routes or schedules.

Then I decided it would be fun to rear-end a car on I-94 a week ago, and my car decided to retaliate by overheating on Tuesday.  Apparently this is what happens when one demolishes the engine cooling fan in said accident.  Since the car is not drivable (and the bf is conveniently with his car in Minnesota), enter the "big green bus" or the scary world of public transit.

The last time I had to commute to work was when I was living in Bay View - the commute took an hour long bus ride and a 3/4 mile walk.  In the rain (ok, it really did rain once).  And that was a straight shot.  I couldn't imagine how hellish an East Side to West Allis commute would be.  Turns out, it's not so bad even with a transfer downtown.  The #44 Freeway Flyer is a wonderful thing that drops/picks up 3 blocks from work.  It's only a couple blocks between the transfer points, it only live a block away from the bus stop (about 10 blocks total, if you're keeping track) and...it only adds 30 minutes to my total commute.  For real.  But the best part?  I can listen to my iPod, play games or facebook while someone else drives - and I get to be "entertained" by the sights, such as crazy bus riders and bubble gum pink Audis.

I got to thinking:  maybe this IS actually possible.

But what about running errands or grocery shopping or dog food?  

Well, I thought about that too.   I work walking distance to a 'big-box" grocery store, so I can stock the work fridge with lunches.   Plus, I tend to lean toward the European way of grocery shopping - stopping by the store daily to get what you need (and guarantee it's fresh - part of the theory, not necessarily me). There are friends I can probably con into driving me to get dog food or to Target, or to Target to get dog food - for a nominal fee (read: lunch at Arby's).  And there is this little thing called ZipCar, where you can reasonably "rent" a car by the hour - conveniently located on UWM's campus.  For longer trips, there's always Enterprise.  But realistically, I've grown fond of the "pedestrian lifestyle" and tend to walk wherever I can.  Plus, most of the time I do things "in da hood" or I persuade someone else to drive.

Yes, I am still thinking this is possible.  And that it still makes sense.

Globally, I'd be leaving my "carbon footprint" and being eco-friendly - but really, I'm viewing that as an added bonus.  Economically, I would save about $380/month ($4500/year) by not having a car.  That's a number one can't argue with - who wouldn't want an extra chunk of money each month?  Emotionally (aka sanity), driving and other drivers piss me off causing me not to enjoy the experience.  Leaving it to someone else helps me maintain (at least some) stability.  And sanity - in any arena - is a good thing.

This isn't to say that living a car-free lifestyle is permanent.   However, right now it seems to be the way to go.

Seriously.

look who's 10!

Over Memorial Day weekend 2002, my life changed forever when a nine month old pup entered my home...and my heart.

To be honest, I wasn't the one who initially noticed Cayenne online - and I was a bit hesitant to get another dog.  Upon further research I learned that he had already been in and out of two homes, and was searching for his "forever home".  Then I was sucked in by those big, brown eyes and big, goofy smile.  There was no doubt in my mind that Cayenne would be my dog.

Cayenne arrived in Wisconsin via plane from California.  His plane ticket was more than he was.  When he touched ground, he was skittish - and understandably so.  I mean, how would you feel if you were just shipped off 2000 miles away?  In fact, I'm told he peed in the car on the way home.  I finally met him after work that Friday, and Caye greeted me the adorable clumsiness of a pup still trying to grow into his body.  This would likely explain many of my "mystery bruises" those first few months.

Over the nest few weeks, Caye settled into his new digs nicely -although I did need to teach him that the sniffing of the crotch is not an appropriate greeting for humans (and yes, once in a while we still need to work on that) and that shoes are not toys.  It was also apparent Caye was indeed my dog.  If you remember the My Buddy doll ads, that was Caye and I - he was pretty much surgically attached to me whenever I was home.

Since he was always underfoot, I had plenty of opportunity to observe Caye's personality.  He has to be one of the most curious (read:  "little shit"), gentlest, happiest and friendliest dogs I've ever known.  Trust me, he tries to make friends with all animals (see above pics).  Because of this, I still wonder why his first two owners didn't want him.  Maybe it's because he's a "bully breed" (read:  American Pit Bull, American Staffordshire and like breeds) and was stereotyped as a "fighter" - which he is obviously not.  Maybe they didn't want a family dog or didn't want to care for him.  Maybe they couldn't deal with the clumsiness and training of a puppy.  Whatever the reason, I'll never know.  I'll also never know what the first nine months of his life were like - although I have some suspicions.  Despite that, Caye easily forgave the actions of his previous owners (as dogs do) by trusting and accepting me with open paws.  What I do know is that Cayenne ended up where he was supposed to be.

And while I was there for Caye by giving him a forever home, he's been there for me too. During my whole divorce ordeal, he was the best listener and snuggler ever.  We mourned the loss of Lily (his older sister) together.  Caye also laid by me after my knee surgery (careful not to actually touch the knee) to make sure I was okay...although never completely understood why I couldn't take him for a walk.   Yes, dogs are amazingly intuitive.  Dogs also possess and provide unconditional love, despite all your idiosyncrasies.  If you don't believe this, you must witness how Caye reacts when I come home from work (or taking out the garbage).  To be honest, I love the big guy too - quirks and all.  These quirks include, but are not limited to:  a fondness for black labs, regardless of gender; the need to turn around three times before retiring on the bed for the night and the propensity to rip the faces off all his stuffed toys. 

Cayenne has also served as a fantastic ambassador (ambassadog) for his breed.  People compliment me on what a sweet and well-behaved boy he is - usually after they comment on how muscular and handsome he is.  I mean, how can you resist that smile and wagging tail (which actually wiggles his whole body)?  Cayenne was socialized from his beginnings with me, and is always willing to meet other dogs and people as well as tag along on public excursions.  His favorites include the farmer's market and the Palomino, not only because of the "sniff stops" and affection from folks, but because of the very good chance he'll get bacon.  (Ok, maybe it's really because of the bacon).  Regardless of the motive, Caye's charming and endearing demeanor - plus good looks and positive attitude - has won over skeptics and changed more than a few minds about the perception of the breed.  That was never my intent, but Caye is indeed a "poster dog" for all that is good in "bully breeds".

Nine years later, Cayenne is (finally) showing signs of his age by mellowing a bit and white hair on his face while still maintaining the curiosity and playfulness of a puppy, and of course, his undeniable zest for life.  He is the best pup anymore could ask for...and I wouldn't trade him for the world. 

Happy 10th birthday big guy! 

palin = moron

Last fall, Sarah Palin characterized Michelle Obama's "Let's Move" anti-obesity campaign as an assault on individual rights.

"What she is telling us is that we can't trust parents to make decisions for their families in what we should eat," Palin told radio host Laura Ingraham. "Instead of a government thinking that they need to take over and make decisions for us according to some politician or politician's wife priorities, just leave us alone."

So tell me, how is this different from the GOP taking over and attempting to force legislation to dictate women's reproductive rights? 

Fucking idiot.

quote from this article

that little hardware store

Birthdays tend to make one nostalgic...and apparently I am no exception. 

As I walked by the True Value on Downer Avenue Sunday afternoon, I was reminded how similar it was to Poch's Hardware in the Village (Potomac, MD).  Like the True Value, Poch's was nestled between a grocery store, restaurant and specialty shops.

Poch's was your quintessential neighborhood store.  I remember going to Poch's with my dad back in the day (prior to the big-box home store explosion) if he needed potting soil, nuts & bolts, lumber, etc.  Mr. Poch was behind the counter and he always had time to chat with the customers (and give a lollipop to the kids - it was a time this behavior was not considered "creepy").   I'm sure this "Village friendliness" has affected me - today I seem to small talk with cashiers at the store. 

In my high school years, I worked at a Hallmark store (which I blame for my like of funky pens) - one of those shops nestled in the Village, like Poch's.  And more than once, my dad would call and ask me to pick up something at Poch's, "because I was right there".  I should probably thank them for teaching me about drill bits, saw blades and other assorted tools. 

Sadly, Poch's closed near the turn of the century.  The Village reinvented itself and began catering to more "upscale" clientele, and I'm sure insurgence of Home Depot & Lowe's didn't help either.

However, I'll fondly remember Poch's and it's piece in my history of the Village. 

birthday wishes 2011

soybean wishes & dreams

On Tuesday, I will celebrate my (undisclosed age here) birthday.  And I've learned yet again, it doesn't matter how old you are - your mother will still ask "what do you want for your birthday?"

This year I actually had an answer:  a MacBook.  I think I'm just going to get a check, which undoubtedly will end up going toward something else.

So with that segue, I give you my birthday wishes of 2011:

• procure a MacBook - did I mention I really want one of these?  
• amp up physical activity - hashing, boot camp and volleyball are great...but maybe get back into yoga?
• try to eat better - as an admitted "junk food junkie", sometimes it's a chore to sneak salads in there (because a cheeseburger & tots sounds so much better) even though I actually don't mind salads.
• attempt to be culinary - stop laughing.  I mean it- I've even considered taking a class.  Damn you Food Network and shows like "Chopped"!
• embrace my curls - as a friend put it "learn to love the hair you're in!"  I will say this "embracing" makes getting ready in the morning uber-easy.
• beat my brother in "Words with Friends" - he gets all the good letters, I swear.
• travel somewhere besides DC & Chicago - love those places, but I also want to explore somewhere new (or revisit Toronto).
• see Wisco Gov. Scott Walker get recalled - that would be a happy day!
• increase social media knowledge - I'm a geek.  I like this stuff.
• engage in artistic endeavors - painting, photography, drawing....I need to be creative at home, even if I'm that way at work too (because it's a different type of creative).
• continue to promote rjl creative -  this will happen.  Although I'm toying with a name change to "marketing & design" or naming it after Caye with a % of the proceeds going to dog rescues, which leads to....
• become involved with APBT & AmStaff dog rescue/advocacy - if you've met Cayenne, you understand why.

A few less than last year but this year, most of these "wishes" are actually attainable (2010's playing the bass and world peace, not so much).  The "Words with Friends" one might be kind of tough - does anyone have a portable Scrabble dictionary I can borrow?

keep your post to yourself

A recent Facebook post:

Can anyone tell me why it is so hard to pray, but easy to swear? Why gangs are growing and churches are shrinking? Why it is so hard to re-post a Christian status, but easy to post gossip? Why we can worship a celebrity, but not Jesus? Gonna ignore this? The Lord said, if you deny Me in front of your friends, I will deny you in front of my Father. Re-Post if you're not afraid of what your friends will think.

People are entitled to their own beliefs (even if I don't necessarily agree); and I am also entitled to mine.  However, when it comes to the topic of religion it is the skeptics, non-believers and those questioning their faith who are often ostracized by the religious right for their beliefs.  Yes, someone has every right to post and believe in the above - thanks to the First Amendment.  In turn, I have the same right to disagree with and refute the above, so I will.

Can anyone tell me why it is so hard to pray, but easy to swear? 

In my case, yes I can.  I don't pray.  To be honest, I never did.  All those times growing up when I was supposed to be praying in church (such as after communion), I was people watching; often making mental notes of hideous outfits and seeing if I knew anyone.  Years later, I do the exact same thing when I attend Christmas mass with my mom (which I now view as part of my Christmas gift to her).  

The whole concept of prayer somewhat astounds me.  How can someone ask for help, guidance or anything  to an entity that may or may not exist?  If you need or want something, shouldn't you do everything in YOUR power to achieve it?  On some level, I view praying as a version of "passing the buck".  What I mean by that is some people "leave it up to God" and make no real effort on their part to achieve the end goal, or any effort to improve themselves.  This is not to say that everyone who prays does this - I know plenty of people who do pray and are quite industrious and ambitious in their efforts. But to not take full responsibility for your choices and your life seems quite juvenile. 

As for the easy to swear part, I find swearing somewhat therapeutic at times (i.e. when I totally botch a set at volleyball).  Plus "fuck" is one of the most versatile words in the American English language.

 

Why it is so hard to re-post a Christian status, but easy to post gossip? 

This is easy to answer.  First, I have always viewed religion to be a private matter.  What you believe is fine and good, but for fuck's sake (note the versatility), I don't need to know about it.  And it seems those who are the most adamant about shouting their beliefs from the rooftops are the ones trying to compensate for something else - perhaps their "unChristian-like" behaviors.  That could be another blog entirely (and likely will be in the future).  In reality, I cannot tell you the religious belief (or lack of) of most my friends.  Honestly, I really don't care what your beliefs are - until you attempt to shove your beliefs down my throat.  Overall, my more religious friends have been good about not over-broadcasting their beliefs - although the posting of these status messages are pushing the line, in my opinion.

Second, if you're not Christian - and trust me not everyone is, despite what you may be led to believe - it's damn easy not to re-post (or post) a Christian status. And as a side note, why don't the Jewish feel compelled to post a Jewish status?

Third, I may enjoy gossip but I do not post it on Facebook or any other social media outlet. 

Why we can worship a celebrity, but not Jesus? 

The act of worship is to show reverence and adoration for a deity; or to treat (someone or something) with the reverence and adoration appropriate to a deity.  Essentially, putting them on a pedestal.  Yes, it is true that some people do worship celebrities, but that is not the norm (and on some level, these said people might need some professional help).  While I may admire some celebrities for their talent and/or using their clout to promote the greater good or causes I believe in, it's not worship.  Of course, this is presuming Jesus did indeed exist.  If not, how is worshiping an "idea" any worse than worshiping a celebrity?  At least the celebrity as a living, breathing human being that indeed exists.

The Lord said, if you deny Me in front of your friends, I will deny you in front of my Father.

Going out on a limb, I guessing this is stated in the Bible.  However, Christianity (as well as other religions) tend to pick and choose what scripture to follow.  For example, the Bible also states the punishment for adultery is the stoning the "guilty" party on his/her front porch.  I personally did not do it (as fun as it might have been), nor do I see it as a common punishment in this day and age.  

At a place of employment, you can't pick and choose what responsibilities you decide to fulfill; you need to perform ALL of them.  Shouldn't it be the same for a religion? 

Re-Post if you're not afraid of what your friends will think.

I am sure some will be angered or offended by this train of thought.  However, I'm not afraid of what my friends think...that's why I wrote this blog.

And as you can see, it was WAY to long to post in a status message or note.